新年快樂 (Happy New Year)!

In preparation for the Chinese New Year, the students at our school have been creating and decorating the halls and walls with lanterns, fans, Chinese masks, and other things for the past two weeks or so. Because the Chinese New Year is a holiday for us, there was an all-school Chinese New Year celebration assembly last Friday. Students at all three levels of the school sang Chinese songs and performed Chinese dances, culminating in the traditional lion dance by some of the high school students. Unfortunately, I've only been able to upload this one video, which captures a portion of the lion dance.

There will be celebrations throughout Bangkok, including lion dances and parades at malls and in Chinatown, of course. Many people, including us, are taking advantage of the long weekend for a quick jaunt to the beaches. We are meeting up with a friend whom we met years ago in the U.S., but who has since moved to Asia and is currently living in Macau! It has been at least a decade since we've seen her. She will be on holiday for the Chinese New Year and visiting Thailand. What good timing! 

[The only worry we have is the protesting that is still going on and its effect on us going to and from the airport. We're flying out of a different airport this time, so we're not sure how traffic will be. There will be an election on Sunday, the day we return from the beach, and we're unsure how that will turn out. In the past few days, the protests seemed to have ramped up, and one of the protest leaders was killed last weekend. The protestors are calling to block the election. It is a bit worrisome.]

And at 6:30 this morning, on Chinese New Year's eve, the firecrackers began in the neighborhood next to ours. Yes, at 6:30 in the morning. Good thing we were already awake getting ready for the day! When the Thai people celebrate, they go all out!! Happy year of the horse, everyone!

恭禧發財

Decisions, Decisions...

With the recruitment season for international schools upon us, and especially with one of the international-school job fairs having taken place close to home in Bangkok just last week, I got to thinking (more than usual) about the decision we'll be making ourselves later this year: whether we will be staying in Thailand, moving on to another country, or going home to the U.S. at the end of the school year in 2015.

In about nine months, the first decision we'll have to make is whether we'll be staying a third year in Thailand. Getting more experience and finances are two main reasons for us to stay. First, my husband could start getting experience and training to teach International Baccalaureate classes, which, along with his decade-plus years of teaching experience, would make him very attractive to other international schools, most of which have that program. He already has experience teaching the Middle Years Programme, which is the IB program for lower grades (middle to lower high school). In addition, the school will have several special-education teaching positions open next school year, and the school has pretty much told me that one of them is mine if I can get provisional certification for next year and if I am willing to work on getting my expired teaching certificate reinstated while I am teaching next year. So working here for two years would also make me more attractive to other international schools, and make us both marketable as a teaching couple with only one dependent. The other incentive for us to stay here another year is that, after three years here, my husband would get to keep 50 percent of the matching that the school makes to his retirement fund.

The thing is, we haven't exactly been completely thrilled with the education our son is getting here, so we don't think staying another year just to receive a small amount of extra money and for us to get one more year of experience is worth the cost to our son's education. Not to mention, I'm not crazy about living where we live now. After having just been to other Asian cities where we were able to walk everywhere and had so many options when it came to activities and food, coming back to this mind-numbingly dull suburb of Bangkok has been excruciating. Where we live now is very similar to, if not worse than, many sleepy American suburbs. At least in the suburbs of D.C., there were always things going on, for adults, children, and families alike. There was diversity in the people. While I strongly suspect that I would feel very differently about life here if we were living in, or close to, downtown Bangkok instead of its suburbs, the fact is that we can't live downtown. The commute to and from school every day would kill any quality of life we gain by moving there. And I refuse to subject a seven-year-old to an even earlier wake-up time and long commutes on a daily basis, even if most other parents at the school have no problems with it.

So at this point, we are leaning towards not staying a third year here. After that decision is made comes the more difficult decision -- whether to continue living abroad or move back home, where my husband has a teaching position being held for him by our county that he can return to if we go home after two years abroad. If we decided to stay abroad, my husband would have to resign from our county and reapply for a job should we ever return. Luckily, even after we make our decision about whether to stay in Thailand, we will still have until the spring of 2015 before we have to give an answer to our school system back home.

Right now, we have no idea what we are going to do; our feelings about this change from day to day, sometimes even from hour to hour. Back in November, I was, finally, beginning to settle in and get into the routine of life. I could see us living and working abroad for an extended period of time. Then December came and we left the country for vacation, and now I feel as if I'm back to square one. Since coming back to Thailand, I've spent many waking hours dreaming about returning to the U.S., where there is an abundance of things to do, see, and eat. Back home is where my friends and family are. Back home, everything is comfortable, familiar, and convenient.

Still, there are many times when I feel I have more living abroad to experience before heading home permanently. And if we go home after our two years here, we may never get the chance to work abroad again. Most teachers who do this are in their 20s or at most early 30s. There are some who begin teaching abroad around our age or in their 50s, but those who begin around our age have been doing this for at least a decade and plan to retire here, and those who are in their 50s have already retired from U.S. schools, so they already have retirement funds in the U.S. and don't need to worry about paying for college for their kids (they all have grown kids already). Most international schools have an age cut-off, so many teachers in their late 40s, 50s, and early 60s have trouble getting teaching jobs at international schools.

In the long run, if I return to teaching, and we get a situation with a good school (for all three of us) in a nice city somewhere, we would consider staying there until our son graduates from high school. For starters, we don't want to move him around too much, so if we get jobs at a good school and we're happy there, it would be a no-brainer. Then there's all the traveling we'd get to do if we stayed abroad. And since leaving the U.S., we have all felt so much less stressed and much more relaxed; it's really good on my mental health not having to hear about all the political wrangling going on day in and day out, news about all the horrible things happening, and all the fighting over things that can and should be handled using common sense. I know every country has its own set of problems, but there is something about life in the U.S. that can be unnecessarily stressful and frustrating -- despite all the comforts and conveniences available there -- that I have not heard of expats experiencing in other countries.

The biggest incentive to stay abroad is a financial one, of course. If I returned to teaching, having two incomes would put us in a great place financially in the long run. There is a teaching couple here who started teaching abroad in Shanghai ten years ago, when they were around our age. In that time, they have not only been able to build up their retirement funds, travel extensively, and live a comfortable life, but they also have been able to save an additional $200,000 to pay for their daughter's attendance at an expensive, private university in California. She graduates in May this year. We look to them as an example of what our lives could be should we stay, and it's very tempting to base our decision on just this.

But there are other considerations. Would I be happy returning to teaching? To be honest, I miss the intellectual stimulation that working as a lawyer provided, and teaching as a special education teacher (as opposed to teaching a specific content area) would not give me the intellectual stimulation that I want. Also, I may want to try my hand at other career options that may not be realizable abroad. And we wonder about the long-term effects of raising our son overseas: would it cause him to feel out-of-place and disconnected wherever he goes, just as moving to and growing up in the U.S. did to me? The students at our school all seem very accepting and are used to seeing friends come and go, and my son seems to be very much at home here and more confident about himself than before, but who knows what it'll be like once he hits middle and high school? Then there's home in the U.S., which we know we would really miss for many years to come should we decide to stay abroad. Staying abroad also may mean letting go of the plans of things we wanted to do in the U.S. Last, but not least, there are my parents, who are getting on in age, so I would really like to be around for them. I also want my son to be able to see them more often and continue his relationship with them. I am always surprised to hear other expat families here say that they don't miss the U.S. or their families and friends back home, or brush aside questions about their children's relationships with their families, even though they haven't been here for that many more years than we have.

It's a difficult decision to make, and it's hard to sort out all the factors when different aspects of our lives are pulling us in different directions. We are really hoping that our visit home this summer will provide some clarity, so we will be able to make this decision with confidence early next school year.

Seeing Vietnam by Train: Hanoi and Homecoming

The final destination of our vacation -- which we have dubbed "The H Tour" as all the cities we visited started with "H" -- was Hanoi. A fifth destination, Halong Bay, was scrapped at the last minute. We were supposed to spend one day and night in Halong Bay, visiting the islands and caves there, but because it's at least three hours away from Hanoi by car or bus, and we didn't arrive in Hanoi until almost noon on Sunday, we were exhausted and decided to stay in Hanoi for five nights and four full days.

The weather was gorgeous while we were there. Each day was sunny, with temperatures in the mid- to upper 60s. 

On top of the trains at the Hanoi train station.

A wall of murals that spanned almost the entire length of the highway on our way to our hotel.

The wall also had carvings.

More murals.

A cheerful mural scene.

We showed up at our hotel one day early because of our canceled plans in Halong Bay, and the hotel staff couldn't be more accommodating, getting us one extra night there with the same discount deal we had for the other four nights. Because we stayed for so many days, the manager and staff got to know us and our little boy, and the manager took it upon himself to make sure we were taken care of.

The staff and manager were very taken with our son, joking with him that they wanted him to stay at the hotel with them instead of coming home with us. I had mentioned in a previous post that we, as a family, and my son as an individual, received many more curious looks and much more attention in Vietnam than in Thailand. Well, in Hanoi, the attention directed to my son became more frequent and more obvious. People we passed on the streets, and shopkeepers sitting outside, would stop us to look at him, touch his cheeks, pat him on the head, shake his hand, or ask for a high five from him. One shopkeeper, whose store we were browsing in, kept saying things to us like "Lovely boy!" "He's so fun!" or "I love him!" It was awkward as I knew they were well-intentioned and harmless, but my sense of boundary was obviously much stronger than theirs.

Our hotel towering over adjacent buildings.

Front of the hotel, all decked out for the holidays.

Lobby. There were so many doormen that we didn't need to lift a finger going in and out of the building and the elevators. I joked that the only things they didn't do for us were feeding and toileting us.

View of Hanoi from our hotel room window.

View from the hotel's rooftop restaurant.

Another view from the rooftop restaurant.

A switch instead of a sign on the door knob to notify the maid to clean the room.

A view of a side street from our hotel room that I managed to capture by sticking my camera out of the small opening in the window.

Hanoi was not quite as interesting to me as the other cities. There was a mix of European-style and Asian-style architecture, which made the city appear quaint, but most of it were in various states of decay and filth. It reminded me somewhat of Bangkok. The traffic there also was crazier and more chaotic than in Ho Chi Minh City, with everyone driving between lanes (sounds familiar...) and honking even more than in other parts of Vietnam (at least there is hardly any honking in Bangkok). The incessant honking drove me crazy!

Nevertheless, I grew fond of this city. There was a number of cute cafes to hang out and watch people, lots of bakeries, so many different really good Vietnamese restaurants, and lots of restaurants serving cuisines from other countries. There were so many options, unlike where we live in Bangkok. We stuffed ourselves with all kinds of Vietnamese food and more western food in the two weeks of our trip than in five months of living in Thailand. Western food there, while more expensive than the local cuisine, was still cheaper than it is in Bangkok. Best of all, they had amazing coffee (which I don't drink, but my husband bought some weasel coffee to bring back here), teas, and pastries. Each morning, we had more than our fill of croissants, danishes, cheeses, and breakfast meats. The people were much more relaxed than in Ho Chi Minh City, and didn't bother us much. The driving also was slower and seemed safer than in Bangkok.

We walked throughout the city and explored it every day. It was fantastic how easily we could get around. We must've walked at least two miles each day. Needless to say, we all slept well! Our hotel was right on the border of the Old Quarter, so we had a chance to explore that part of Hanoi in detail. We also went to modern areas and visited various historic sites. We had a fabulous stay there.

Some random sights of the city:

A huge market, similar to the one we visited in Ho Chi Minh City.

Streets at night.

The streets and shops are always busy, no matter what time of the day it is, just like in Bangkok. I'm so curious about what people do for a living that they can just stroll and browse or hang out in cafes all day long!

A random temple we came upon during our stroll.

Apartment buildings in the center of Hanoi.

Masks for sale.

Funny t-shirt.

KFC in Vietnamese.

A wall of beautiful fans in a shop.

A random game of badminton at a sidewalk.

Hilarious cafe name.

National pride.

Cute buildings.

Another funnily named restaurant.

Scorpio whiskey. It's been decades since I've seen these.

Can you guess what the name of this cafe is?

I really wish we had room in our suitcases to bring home a poster from this place!

This street only had stores related to stereo equipment.

Chat & Date cafe!

I loved all the colors in some of the shops.

So that's how they install a new water tank in the upper story of a building!

K-Mart CVS...Doubt it's similar to either store in the U.S.

Lunch time! In Thailand, street food = food stalls along the streets, where as street food in Vietnam is more literal: people sit on the sidewalks with small pots/stoves/grills and cook the food right on the sidewalk. One night, we saw a woman grilling corn on a small grill on the sidewalk. One of the cobs rolled off the grill onto the pavement, and she just picked it up and kept right on grilling it! And the streets of Hanoi are covered in filth!

Notice the closing time of this place...Not helpful.

A few of our finest meals in Hanoi:

A friend recommended that we go to this place, so we did. The name of the restaurant is the name of the (one and only) dish it serves! Once we sat down, a man plunked down the "menu" on our table: a laminated index-card-sized paper that says, "We serve only one dish. Grilled fish....170000d/person." We had it with vermicelli noodle and an assortment of sides, much like with Korean food.

This is the grilled fish. The waitress added greens to the grilled fish (which was delicious, frying in oil as we ate) and let it cook for a few minutes.

Getting our Korean food fix in Hanoi.

An awesome restaurant that was so good we went for dinner there two nights in a row.

Simmered pork in a clay pot that we had at the restaurant above.

The dish that brought us back for two nights in a row: Braised eggplant in garlic sauce.

Some of the famous places in Hanoi that we visited....First, there was the center of Hanoi and Lake of the Returned Sword. Legend has it that this was where a turtle god approached the emperor Le Loi to reclaim a golden sword that he received previously from the turtle god's master. In the middle of the lake is a pagoda named Turtle Tower, in association with the folklore.

 

 

 

On Jade Island of the lake stood Temple of the Jade Mountain, which can be accessed via a red, wooden bridge called The Huc Bridge.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A monument to Le Loi by the lake that we happened upon.

 

 

We also got to see a water puppet show at the water puppet theater. There was a band of musicians that played and sang traditional Vietnamese music to accompany the show. On the stage, where the floor would've been, was the pool of water where the puppets were performed. At the end of the show, all the puppeteers came out in the water for applause. There also was an exhibit of old water puppets outside the auditorium. Audience members had to pay to take pictures or videos during the show, but no one paid and everyone's cameras were clicking away. It was probably another scam to get more money out of those who didn't know better.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Temple of Literature, which is a temple of Confucius built in 1070 and was the site of Vietnam's first national university. The university was established in 1076 and remained open until 1779. The compound is comprised of five courtyards with temples, gates, gardens, ponds, and turtle steles with the names of students who were successful at the royal exams.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

People were tracing their names on this board for good luck, so we did it too.

The Museum of Fine Arts is a beautiful building housing art, stone sculptures, furniture, costumes, paintings, and artifacts that go back as far as the Iron and Bronze ages.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We walked by the Ho Chi Minh Mausoleum, but didn't go in...Just had no desire to see the dead body of a dictator, for some reason. The grounds of the mausoleum was huge and beautiful. People were strolling about, enjoying the weather, as if it were just a regular, old park. There was a map of the grounds. We thought it was funny that there was a garage housing Ho Chi Minh's used cars. Also, I wonder what a gift shop of a dictator's mausoleum sells....

 

 

 

We also visited another Buddhist temple, called One Pillar Pagoda, near the mausoleum.

Our last stop in Hanoi was Hoa Lo Prison (a.k.a. "Hanoi Hilton"), where John McCain was held as prisoner during the Vietnam War. Built by the French in the 1800s, it was originally intended to hold Vietnamese political prisoners agitating for independence.

Now it's been transformed into a museum. There was very little about the Vietnam War in the museum, and what little there was consisted of anti-American propaganda. Even as a museum, it could be distressing to walk through. Before going there, my son was very anxious about the visit, worrying about "bad guys with guns" and being locked in the prison. We told him it was now a museum and was safe, and gave him a choice not to go, but he still chose to go. In the end, he was more fascinated than anything else.

 

Glass shards to prevent escape.

A model of the original compound.

The bottom picture is a picture of the prison bathroom.

Stones used to build the prison.

The doors to the prison.

Bricks used by the French to build the prison.

Description of food for the prisoners.

Bowls used by prisoners.

Female political prisoners.

This was what a prison cell looked like. The dummies as prisoners were jarring and creepy.

All the prisoners were shackled by the ankles.

The creepiest stairwell I've ever seen by far.

Solitary confinement.

A tale of escape by Vietnamese political prisoners and the piece of sewer through which they escaped.

Toilet for the prisoners.

Lists of the names of the political prisoners held at the prison.

A memorial commemorating Vietnamese political prisoners.

One last look at Hanoi at the Hanoi airport. We were ready to come back and have some time to decompress before heading back to school. Once we got home, though, everything felt so strange and unfamiliar. It felt like a million years ago that we were in Thailand. It seemed like it was another family, and not us, that lived in this house. Hopefully, this feeling will fade as the days go by.